Only Jesus Transforms Our Relationships (Colossians 3:18-4:1)

Bible Passage: Colossians 3:18-4:1

As Paul has reached the part of his letter where he is applying the gospel message to the lives of his hearers, he turns his focus to the different relationships of life and shows the ways the gospel truth transforms those relationships. The form of this section is a familiar one in ancient literature, known as a household code. The idea is to break down the roles and responsibilities of different members of the family towards one another. Paul takes this familiar form in a subversive direction, and by emphasising the obligations of both husbands and wives, both children and parents, and both slaves and masters, he is pain ting a picture of relationships of mutual love and service.

Husbands and Wives (v18-19): Instruction are given to both the husband and the wife, and together they are supposed to form a harmonious marriage. Traditional household codes of the day would emphasise the wife’s submission without any call for the husband to treat her in a loving and gentle way. Paul redresses that balance, emphasising that the husband too has responsibilities to the wife. The instruction for the wife to submit is likely to bristle, but it should be remembered that these instructions belong together, and create a picture of both partners in the marriage putting the other before themselves. When both are acting in this way, it leads to a healthy and beautiful marriage.

Children and Parents (v20-21): Again, there are instructions for both parties. Children are called to obey their parents, but this does not give licence for parents to act however they want. They should be thoughtful and encouraging to their children, and it is as they do this that the climate is created for healthy obedience. The instructions come as a pair and if one is emphasised in the absence of the other then it could lead to an unhealthy environment, but if both are lived out in response to one another then a peaceful and harmonious home will be the result.

Masters and Slaves (3v22-4v1): This is the trickiest of the three sets of instructions. It should not be seen as an endorsement of slavery as a concept, but slavery was the reality that some of his readers were living in and so Paul wanted to help them live out this relationship in light of the gospel. His instructions are wholehearted work for the slave and fairness for the master. These principles do translate into other circumstances, including the contemporary workplace, although care should be taken in making such a leap, as a key difference is the agency an employee has to leave their employment, whereas a slave was trapped in their slavery.

Potential Applications:

• The passage is challenging for the way we relate to each other. You could leave time for people to reflect and let the Holy Spirit speak to them about the relationships in their own life.
• Perhaps some will feel a prompt to repent if they have not treated others around them with kindness and gentleness.
• Each of the relationships mentioned is also used in the Bible as a picture of a relationship with God. You could invite people to choose one of these images as a focus for worship and praise God as bridegroom, as father or as master.